Since my sister Rebecca decided two weeks ago she could no longer stay on this planet, and took her life. I have been thrown into experiencing and exploring grief and extraordinariness of a wild and profound unknown place. I'm SOOooo very grateful for the support of the dance, for the skilful aware and compassionate teachers you have trained and the amazing global dancing tribe there is now in the world; I feel the power passion and love of that.
There is SOOOooo much love in this world .. so much pain ... I'm SO grateful to be able to explore, what is, through the dance. . . with my body, with my voice .. beyond the words ... touching a place of complete knowing, dropping into the space between the frames of the film of what seems to be this life ... sensing other places, extraordinary beauty, extraordinary pain ... WHAT a MYSTERY.
3 days after Rebecca took her life I went to Jo Hardy's class class here in Totnes in Devon, - - the sound system 'packed up' in chaos .(!!) .. so we 'silently' . . . with just (!) our voices and breath and rhythm of the feet went thru the 'end' of chaos . .. my heart broke .. broke open ... I collapsed to the floor ... the power of life moving through me.. transforming me ... releasing the trauma of from the cells of my body ....from having seen my sister Rebecca still with the face of agony and with the rope around her neck. I was guided out of chaos ... softening, moving softening ... as I emerged there was someone to great me fully powerfully present .... eyes of love and compassion - since that moment the flashbacks are no longer there, and I no longer feel the rope around my neck. AM SO grateful for that journey and transformation.
On Tuesday night after the Cremation, my family gathered here in my Studio Barn, with Fanny Behrans to dance. It was JUST extraordinary. ..... my parents, in their 70's my two younger sisters, my brother in law and 2 nieces one just 9 years old ... and my ex wife(!) We danced, and danced and cried and shook and screamed and listened and witnessed ... SUCH a blessing.
On Wednesday after a ritual to plant a tree and scatter the ashes I danced with Susannah DK and our local tribe here on Wednesday in Devon, UK . . . held, held held and loved ( and feared!).... At the end of the evening I played my sisters bamboo flute ..(seems I now play flute as well as viola!) .. a beautiful playful energy, Rebecca's, came in to the space. .... we then sat in circle and I shook and shook .. silently .. then a wail came from me like I've never experienced ... w o w. . . .. what a blessing to move and be moved.
for 5R dance classes near you in the UK see http://www.5rhythmsuk.com/ for other places globally go to http://www.ravenrecording.com/
